Busted II


A few short months ago I wrote about a funny coincidence where I was dating the same guy as a friend of mine, and we coincidentally found out about it. (The kinda douchy part was that he had canceled a date with me to make one with my friend the same day).  They say lightening doesn’t strike twice, but I just recently dined with another friend of mine, and he was describing this new guy he was dating and how excited he was about him. They had seen each other 4 times in the last 10 days, and my friend felt it was really getting serious. He was telling me how sexy the guy was and how he was really getting into him. As he was describing him, I realized that the guy is someone I have been talking to online recently, and who has been sending me increasingly insistent messages about wanting to go on a date. I even ran into him out at a restaurant last week, and he made a point of coming up to talk to me, flatter me, and ask for my number. Since that time he has proceeded to send me a string of texts about how attracted he is to me, and how he can’t wait for our first date. Like any of us, I suppose, he has his cute lines he uses on people, but it was odd to compare texts with my friend and see many of the same ones. My friend was a little devastated I’m afraid, as he really thought this was going somewhere. He couldn’t imagine that with as much time as they were spending together recently that the guy would even be interested in pursuing anyone else, even if it was far too early for them to have any sort of monogamy talk. And I will admit, that it seems a little odd to me too. If I had gone out with someone just once or twice in a month or so, it would not feel odd to see other people. But 4 times in less than two weeks? For me, that would mean I was really interested in someone, and that would kinda preclude pursuing other options until at least this courting had run its course. My friend has a date with the guy tonight in fact, but has told me that he doesn’t very much feel like going through with it, and I can’t blame him. Especially since I myself  just received a text from him yesterday asking if I was free this coming Tuesday.

Needless to say, I won’t be going on a date with this guy, ever. Men, you are dogs.



You have to be astounded at the random connectedness of things. Sometimes I think I see almost instant karma at work.

I had a dinner last night with my friend L, down near the Flatrion building. L and I met at a Xmas party and then went on a date or two. We didn’t really click in a romantic way, but got along so well personally that we decided to be friends. Our dinner conversation was pretty wide-ranging and easy, covering topics as diverse as the decline of American culture, recent work, travel, and what our dating lives had been like recently. L mentioned that he had seen me on OK Cupid before and we talked a little bit about that site and what it was like. L told me that he had met someone there and been on a few dates and so far, so good. I mentioned to him that I had also met a guy on the site recently and gone on two or three dates with him, which was a good first sign because I usually don’t get beyond date one. I told L I didn’t know if it would lead to anything, but my philosophy has always been that there is no such thing as a bad date, because everyone has something interesting about them. I mean it, I feel like you really can’t lose. Even if the date is terrible, you have a funny story to tell later. People get so hung up on the “end game” (marriage or whatever), that they fail to experience the “now” of the date itself. Although ultimately, sure, I would like to meet someone serious, I can really enjoy the date itself outside of a greater context.

We then moved on to discussing signs of the apocalypse or the excesses of capitalism or something like that, and among other items I mentioned the ridiculousness of things like the American Girl franchise (Modern Family recently did an amazing send up). L perked up and said,

“What a funny coincidence you mention that, the guy I am seeing works there as a visual merchandiser. We have a date tomorrow night in fact.”

My jaw dropped. The guy that I had been going on dates with also worked there. I asked L his name and sure enough, it matched. And to really kick things in the rear, I realized something kinda shitty, and said,

“Wait a minute, and you have a date with him, TOMORROW NIGHT? We had a date for tomorrow night as well, but he sent me a text yesterday telling me that he had to cancel because — and I quote — ‘something came up and I have to address it’ — unquote.”

L and I were both floored. Then we compared texts, and he showed me how the guy had asked him if he was free during the week, and when L said Wednesday, the guy said no problem. And a few minutes later, I got my cancel text. Then we started comparing notes on all sorts of things, and found that the guy has given us conflicting stories about a lot of things, his family, where they lived, etc. I believe he even gave L some bullshit story about only being able to date “one guy at a time”, that sort of thing.

L said he was going to cancel the date and I suggested he send the guy the exact same text he had sent me about needing to “address something that came up”. Or that we just show up at his work one day pretending to know nothing and letting him squirm a bit. The whole situation was just too sitcom perfect. In fact, you couldn’t even write it, it would seem too contrived and unreal. Imagine the coincidence! Here in a city of millions, that we should not only be dating the same guy at the same time, but also make the connection from a random discussion, AND find out he was lying to both of us, AND on the night before his date. Pretty awesome I say. I told L I was thrilled at the blogging potential.

Well, as they say, isn’t karma a bitch? L cancelled his date, telling the guy exactly why. L got a weak “sorry” text response, and I got roughly the same text from him about an hour later. I resisted the urge to spellcheck and correct the grammar on it and send it back.