Sometimes our dreams reveal clear aspects of our personalities that we are trying to work through. I had such a dream last night:
I was on a fun trip to someplace very far away, and I kept inviting friends to come join us. The apartment we were renting was a great deal arranged by another friend of mine, and we were happy to be there. Later, some friends came from a great distance to join us on short notice and when I went to pay my arranging friend for the rooms, I realized it was a crazy price and we were really being ripped off. I argued at length about it, and he argued back, and I was really upset at myself for having not been more thorough about getting all the info, and how I was letting people down. We were in a dump and paying 500 euros for it (each!), and it turned out just so they could share our space on a dirty floor in this now crappy place.
This is one of those dreams that is so clear to me. For whatever reason (the way I was raised, vague insecurities) I am often worried about negotiating conflict that involves two separate parties. If it is only between me and the other party, no problem at all. I am direct in expressing what I want. But when I am working out a conflict that involves two competing parties, I always want everyone to be happy, even if the competing desires of various parties make that impossible. I am not sure why this particular type of conflict causes me stress when most kinds don’t, but clearly my subconscious is having a go at figuring it out.